12/10/2012–Can’t please all the people all the time.
I’m now getting the true side of people. It took several months and they now don’t hide their frustration or they open up about what people are saying. An accelerator of this is O3s but also as Kyle and I develop and implement new systems there is more feedback (FB) to be heard by us. Now that I’ve had a O3 with almost every employee I can say I’m happy I am doing them, I should’ve scheduled them from day 1, and creating my own form was very effective. I also should’ve stressed the help it would’ve been for Liz/Kyle to do them too. The biggest reason is that then they wouldn’t text me all the time and Kyle/Liz none of the time. The benefit of that is getting to direct the conversation when they make a concern known. I get to hear them, understand the situation, analyze it, and suggest a set of behaviors or at least provide a shoulder and advice. I get practice this way and reap almost all the benefits if it turns out well. Through this experience I develop good judgment from bad judgment and get valuable relationship-building time with the employees.
The downside is obviously the alienation of the other managers from the staff, resulting in possible frustration on their part when they feel “out of the loop”. Also, as I become the confidant, the other managers become out of touch with the staff and my and the other managers’ relationship with employees is inversely growing. I’m wondering if my early relocation would preclude the implosion this trend will cause or if this scenario would sustain itself until I either stop doing O3s or leave, at which point the staff will consist of employees and managers on separate islands. Maybe I’ll paint that pic for Kyle and ask for help with O3s based on that premise. Eh, probably not. He just doesn’t seem like an O3 type. I pissed off Sarah telling her two hosts think she is aggressive sometimes. She said she felt micromanaged. That is one word I never want to hear so I was concerned. After debating whether to apologize today or not I decided to. Her response is the QOTW.
QOTW: “No worries… I totally overreacted.”–Sarah
?FNW: Am I prepared for the busy shifts? Yes
11/11/2017–Not sure why I titled it that but, man, I remember that exact moment giving feedback to Sarah! I was violating a fundamental Manager Tools principle by giving feedback before having a relationship with my direct report. That’s why it didn’t go well, she (like all of us) need to first know that this person recommending a behavior change has our best interest at heart. Looking back, the feedback was definitely appropriate since a server’s relationship with hosts can impact their shift significantly (getting along with coworkers, not saying hosts will give the servers they like good tables).
Regarding the management team not having equivalent relationships with staff–I think this is a unique dynamic in a restaurant setting. It’s usually the case that a staff has multiple managers to whom they directly and equally report. That means it’s a delicate situation to manage from the relationship perspective, not too unlike the mom vs dad effect when one is way softer than the other (speaking from experience here). What’s best for an employee in this situation is a management unit that’s tighter with each other than they are with any single employee.